Winter

 

The rustling of the wind draws my gaze to the window where I notice that the strength of the wind is exceptionally strong today. The trunks of the birch trees in my neighbour's garden bend with the force of the gale gracefully as its branches caress the trunk of a neighbouring Douglas fir. My own life feels the sway and push of the invisible external forces surrounding me as I am hypnotized by the movement and flutter. Swirls of snow twirl across my window in a sparkly chaotic dance before they begin coating the ground with white. The rhythmic vibrations soothe my heart with its lullaby as I sit and cocoon myself in the warmth of blankets and the steam rising from my hot chocolate. 

What Does Nonconsent Really Mean

 

Sometimes I get the feeling that even with a lot of discussion on non-consent appearing in the media and social media, there are those who do not truly understand the concept in its entirety. Some questions that arise from this usually concern when "no" can actually mean "yes." This may sound absurd but a lot of people, regardless of gender, break the rule in many ways that can accumulate over time without realizing what they are doing is wrong. 

    The concept of how we understand and approach the word "no" begins from childhood. As a child or even as a parent, you may realize that the word "no" is thrown around several times a day. There is nothing wrong in this but there may be some habits in the parents that obscure the true meaning and purpose of this word. 

Undivided Attention

 When I am engrossed in something particular, my eyes widen and everything around me temporarily fades out of existence. My peripheral visual field shrinks and the volume of life dial down to zero. My mind decides to spend the majority of its faculties taking in the information that has caught its attention. My attention is entirely undivided. The difficulty arises in getting my mind to focus on the “right” things. When topics interest me or I am working on a task, that is all I can do at the moment. I am not the best multitasker for this reason. Surrounding noises and distractions do not bother me when I reach this stage because I drown out life around me. It is an interesting phenomenon because when I return from whatever had taken an intense grasp, I suddenly become acutely aware of what’s happening beside me.

This talent enabled me to study anywhere if the situation was right. I actually enjoyed the hit of reality when my brain tried of focus so I would pick bustling areas as my study and learning spots. This probably arose from my conditioning of accepting the noise of a large and loud family. There was never quiet in my home and during public school days, I was not allowed to study anywhere other than home. Actually, most of the time, I would try to complete as much of my homework during my classes so that I would have little as possible to bring back home.

Although this sounds like an ideal situation, at times I had to plead with my brain to focus on the task on hand. I usually didn’t win this battle. During class, I sometimes drowned out the teachers and lessons being taught instead of listening and learning. I was a daydreamer after all and my mind conjured up fascinating scenarios instead and time would fly. Before I knew it, the class would be over and I missed everything! This loss of power of my will to pay attention lessened the older I grew and as life present more attractions and distractions.